Let's Dance: Morning 1

September 2 at 8:55am

We're going to dance today and this weekend. Yes, because it's Labor Day Weekend and because I'm slightly ahead with one of my classes. I can hardly believe that, but it's true.

One of my friends asked me how I was doing mentally, emotionally, spiritually via text. I think my response was that I felt safe and at peace currently. However, I'm also aware that these positive feelings can take another shape, form, or direction at any moment and that's okay. What's not okay is how I might emotionally react to that change, which is something that I'm consciously unlearning. Staying aware of my reactions, accepting them, but also, understanding that there is a balance of positive and negative. I can't always be on a high, nor always on a low. I just need to be. Does this make sense?

This morning's goal is to take notes on my psychometrics class from an audio-less recording *face palm*. My professor forgot to unmute herself; I just can't, y'all. I remember when I took a workshop from Paul Nation at Temple University in Tokyo, who taught us that a pencil and notebook are the worst enemies of students. Is there research on this? For me, I've noticed that as a student, when I take notes, I'm unable to register anything that's being taught in front of me. When I'm actively listening, I tend to grasp the concept better, but I can't retain the information long-term. I mean goodness, where's the middle ground? A recorder, probably. And tons of reviewing from watching that recording. 

Another goal is that if I end up feeling slightly frustrated from not understanding the muted recording, I will set it aside and write my first draft of my paper that's due next Thursday. I hope I don't spend another 4-5 hours on a 1.5 page paper. And if I do, that's also okay because I learned in therapy that I subconsciously program myself for academic success by being a perfectionist and particular with my work. There, I admitted it in my thoughts and in writing. Yes, I am a perfectionist and I experience OCD tendencies, but they both serve a greater purpose in my academic life. I've identified them as my "Watchdog" and "Taskmaster." 

Off I go to attempt this thing called being "productive."

Happy Aloha Friday, friends.

We're gonna freakin dance this weekend. 

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